Coughing Up Cake
TLL sent her to me. Now I hear from her daily, her blog comments are usually followed up with an email, where admittedly, she gets a few details that I often forget to include while I’m writing. She’s in a rather unique situation, but I’ll let her explain all of that to you. Sipoftea writes a blog, Coughing Up Cake, where she gives you an inside view of a life most people can’t even imagine. I’ve been trying to get her to write something as a guest blogger here for awhile. She’s been a little stubborn, but finally she introduces herself to us…
Picture this. I’m a less than 25 year old, headscarf wearing half Muslim, wholly lesbian gal living in Africa with 1 husband of 5 years, 1 wife, 1 girlfriend, 2 kids, 1 driver, 2 maids, 4 active cell phones, 1 cook, 2 errand boys, 3 security guards and I still don’t think my life is very interesting. Honestly.
So maybe my days are a little interesting. I haven’t even started on how I got duped into letting my husband marry another woman and how I’m virtually trapped in this country and finding it almost impossible to divorce this man, though not for lack of trying. Or how socializing is practically a sport for which I should have a Blackberry ( I settled for a Nokia smart phone). Seriously. For a semi- introvert like me it’s hell. Anytime anyone I know (or their family member) marries, gives birth, breaks a toe, gets a mosquito bite, a ten times over distant family member dies, has a cough, or it rains too hard on their porch, I’m socially obliged to give money and/or a gift and either call, visit, or text. 9 to 10 I text even if they live five minutes away.
In the midst of it all I’ve fallen in love with Kay. She’s an incredible African woman who is an intelligent, independent, Bachelor degree holding, ambitious and dare I say strong lesbian with the kindest, most compassionate heart I’ve ever encountered. Not to mention sexy as hell. Sometimes I feel I’ve complicated her life unnecessarily by answering her casual message on a non dating site profile I posted. I let her know my circumstances up front, but neither of us anticipated falling in love like this. Still she’s determined to be with me, and has been amazingly strong throughout all of this. I will forever love and admire her for that. She also has to contend with a country in which being homosexual is illegal and punishable, and strong family ties and the expectations that come with that plus tradition thrown in, I have mad admiration and respect for her strength. We click, ebb and flow like nothing else I’ve encountered, and I love her more than I know how to.
Needless to say, it’s shaken things up. I’m trying to phase my way out of this marriage as amicably as possible. With my kids and Kay hopefully in tow.
I’ll let you know when I’m free at last and what happens along the way.
Thanks Sip for sharing! If you haven’t already visited her blog, it’s time to see what’s so wonderful about Coughing Up Cake!
Ahhh. I’ve been missing in action for a few days but, I have good reasons lol. Anywho, I stopped by to catch up. I read over at “coughing up cake” so I’m glad to see her guest blog here. Although I’m still somewhat lost. Last I read over at her blog was about her getting married and having a wife. And possibly going to school. I’ll have to go back and read previous posts so I can keep up because like you she has a very very interesting life.
Sounds absolutely fascinating. I’ll definately give her a look.
Wow!
I agree with Bella. Wow. I visited her site about a week ago, but didn’t stay long because I had some errands to run. Got sidetracked and didn’t get back over there. Thanks for re-introducing her to me.
I loved her blog immediately. I can’t imagine being in her situation, the fact that she manages to keep from pulling her hair out inspires me in my own struggles. She’d be a rad guest blogger.
Very different. I’ll have to read more!
Her life is very interesting.
Thanks for the love Alix ! I’ve been in hiding, shy as all get out upon seeing this post! Thank you gals tons for stopping by
Thanks for showing Sip love!
@Sip, you’re not shy!
I have read ger blog a few times. Her life is quite different from mine. I hope she gets the freedom she seeks.